Here at BamaBoiBlues.com, I pride myself on being as transparent as possible, so that those who read any or all my posts see that we as gay men of color have layers, each more interesting than the last. In my opinion, I've revealed more about myself in over 150 blog entries than I have to my friends, family, and lover. Don't get me wrong, although I am proud to be an open book, I'm also afraid and paranoid about it at times.
Over the years, blogging here has been my personal therapy session as well as a safe space for me to allow my often depressed thoughts roam free. Never did I think I'd be on to something possibly great with the unique essays and personal entries I post. It's hard work and it takes a lot of time. I now see the potential of my blogging platform, and although my blog hasn't put me in a comfy place of job security, I know that it will eventually get noticed.
This blog has been going 4 years strong, and it's been a rocky road, more-so due to my battles with Clinical Depression, which can hinder me from writing weeks at a time. I still come back and post because I do believe that the things I write about reaches out to at least one person who can identify with my experiences in as similar fashion.
My goal here is to show you the life of a gay black male, living in the south, who battles depression, while on a journey to betterment and self-discovery.
I will never be a James Baldwin, a Langston Hughes, an Audre Lorde, or a June Jordan. I'm not aiming to be that intellectual voice that many gay POC have grown accustomed to seeing all over Tumblr, CNN, or old Black Gay Chat forums. All I can be is myself and hope that I'm helping others in my own way. I'm my own subject matter expert at my life!
I know I can do more, but I want to think that in some way I am an activist for LGBT youth of color who deal with depression and anxiety. I'd like to think that I'm a voice to those who are afraid to unveil all their flaws without fear of judgement. I'm hoping that for those questioning where they fit within their community can come here and see how I'm dealing with every aspect of my life.
Every layer of me is here, and it will only get more interesting. From my depression to my sexual discovery, you will find it here at BamaBoiBlues.com.