How are you gay if you don't have "gay sex"? Pt. 1Although the following entry has been sitting in the drafts portion of my blog for about two years, I couldn't find the right time to delve into it until now. Inspired by heartbreak and this MUSED MAG article, here you go:
So, I was asked a question that I've wanted asked of me since creating this blog and establishing my Twitter/Facebook page. I anticipated how I'd feel after being asked this question after years of asking myself. Out of many instances where I've defended my sexuality, this topic is when I really do own my homosexuality, even though others may not consider me to be what I know I am.
The question: "How do you know if you're gay if you've never
My response: ". . . Really?"
I am gay. I wouldn't take this time out to talk about all my moments of self discovery involving my sexuality if I wasn't gay. I wouldn't chronicle all the feelings that I've had, each post about growing into my homosexuality, only to discredit myself by just pulling all of this info out of the air. I am gay, I like men; however, it seems that I may not be considered gay based on the fact that I don't engage in penetrative sex. Again, I DO NOT ENGAGE IN PENETRATIVE SEX at this time! I didn't know that plugging a guy's ass or being plugged made me "officially gay". I thought I'd be cool being asked the question, ready to drop my science on those curious souls, but it didn't pan out that way. I was lost for words, then my mind wandered back to my early years when I thought that my attractions were just a phase in time.
One of the reasons I wanted to write this blog was to discuss certain topics that are only washed over by trolling comments on gay forums. When the topic arises about gay sex, there's probably one guy that mentions that he doesn't engage in anal, and then he is grilled about his sexuality. To quote my fellow blogger of Maybe it's just me, that's completely ridic! I feel that It's the oddest thing to question a gay male about his sexuality just because he has not had what the gay mainstream considers to be sex. This is going to be a long post, kids, so hold tight.
I think of it like a very high school double standard special. You mean I have to just go porno crazy on a guy to prove my homosexuality? And if I'm asked if I
So, what is "gay sex"? For many, the on-spot answer is straight up penetrative sex. To that, my friends, I completely disagree. Firstly, everyone has their own interpretation of sex. So, what you may consider sex, may not be what I consider sex because sex comes in different forms under two umbrellas: penetrative and non-penetrative. If there's another umbrella, use it to shade yourselves and not me because this whole topic is a slippery slope. The issue of sex also affects some to the point of questioning their virginal status, and trust me, I've been there. Now, we can say that you may not be a virgin in one aspect of sex, but you are in another. I say that whatever sexual activity you do with another or others, you're not a virgin in my eyes. However, no matter what I may feel, the masses will still conclude that you are not gay and just a virgin if you have not gotten down and dirty in an ass.
Please check out that article above, and read my comment. Based on my comment. I hope it sheds some light on my take on sex. I'll continue my discussion/rant in Part 2 (been a while since I've done a two-parter), which will focus on the aspect of sex I'm familiar with, which is non-penetrative/intercrual sex. Plus, I may go in on some situations and people. Not out of anger, but out of low-key disappointment. And you tell me? What do you consider sex? I'd like to know.